OMFG IT ITCHES.

Yea I never really got around to talking about this part much - but it's so effing important to mention. THE.ITCHING.

OH.
MY.
GAWD.

the worst.
I can not tell you how many times i laid in bed, propped up by a pillow, with tears just running down my face. The doctors will tell you 'this is good, because it means you're healing', but my god does it feel bad. I can't really describe it, but if you've ever had a scab that's healing you've probably felt it on a very minor level. It's like chicken pox, on crack. Or 1,000 red ant bites all in one area. And of course, you obviously can't scratch it. So you just have to lay there and take it.
You're helpless, and so is everyone around you.

The only thing that helps? Benadryl.
Thank the heavens above for Benadryl, because clearly angels themselves came down and made this stuff. It works legitimate miracles, with one drawback… you'll be in a coma within the hour. So yea, if you plan on functioning as a human being, don't take it. But, if you want to relieve the god forsaken itching and not cry, do it. Those are basically your only two options.

99% of the time i chose to put myself into a coma, and I don't regret it one bit.
sleep > tears.

6 weeks & counting...

It's been 6 weeks. 

Actually, it's been 6 weeks and 2 days to be exact - but hey, who's counting?

I know I haven't been blogging as often, but I've been busy trying to get back to real life, hunting for a new apartment, and focusing on my recovery. Also, my mom left about a week ago and I've been having to do a lot more on my own. (#thestuggle)

Anywho, on with the updates!

So, here's some more recent pics of the progress:

& I even got measured for my compression garment yesterday at my check-in with the hospital. Mine is going to be a bit like high waisted bike shorts that will stop right above my knee. Think 'custom made Spanx' - in black. The purpose of them is to keep pressure constantly on my skin, which will ultimately make my scars flatten out. It also acts as a protective layer while your skin underneath is healing up over the next year. Yes, a year. I have to wear this thing for, A YEAR. fml. Here's how they measure you so that it literally fit's every inch of your leg/body:

I can't technically wear the thing though until all my wounds have closed up 100%, and as you can see from the above photos… my thigh still has a little ways to go. Womp. I'm hoping by the time the garment is ready for me (in two weeks) my thigh will be ready as well. *fingers crossed*

In the meantime I have a temporary compression garment for my torso since my stomach is all closed up. OH MY GAWD, this thing is TIGHT. Here's hoping it doubles as a corset and makes my stomach flat and waist tiny! *fingers crossed again* I'm in no rush to get into the real thing!

Things that I learned from my doctor yesterday:

- no bikini waxes for at least 3 months (#fml)

- no direct sun exposure for 1 year (#fmlfmlfml)

- if i do go in the sun i need to layer on clothing + the strongest SPF sunscreen money can buy

- you can't get addicted to benadryl (even though i'm like 90% sure i am. i heart benadryl.)

- i can work part-time from home

- can't go back in the office full time until i'm physically able to get into a compression garment (evidently this is pretty standard, and truthfully if i had gotten the surgery/skin grafts i probably would be in one by now.)

until next time….

one month update.

Sunday made it officially 4 weeks since my incident.

I've come a LONG way in just 4 weeks, not only physically but mentally as well.
I've gotten completely off the pain meds in the past week, took public transportation for the first time today, and even spoke with a trainer about starting back in the gym soon. I can not wait to get back in the gym, I feel like a useless blob just sitting around and going for long walks. This must be what it's like to be an old person. I don't look forward to it.

Anywho, here are some pics from tonight's bandage change:
(it may look a little bloodier - sorry - but actually that's good! it means my nerve endings and blood flow has come back into that area, i just don't have as many layers of skin there to hold it all in yet. ew. soon though, soon.)

Oh, I also got a fancy new ace bandage yesterday when I went to the burn clinic for my check-in! It's so amazing, I wish I would have been given one sooner. Although I still have a couple of small open wounds I finally feel like I can get around a bit more. I walked over 5 miles yesterday. That's a lot for me even on a normal day! I think I was a bit over eager after getting the ace bandage, but I made it home none the less.